Saw some revenue protection in action today. Amusing it was too.
I won't say too much about the location so as to protect the guilty.
I was sat on the train and the conductor approached a lad across the aisle from me, asking for tickets or fares. The lad did the pocket dance and then after some fumbling fails to produce a ticket, says he must have lost it and then claims he has no money. Conductor says he'll have to take some details, but lad refuses to give name, address, or produce ID. Conductor warns him that he's committing two criminal offences, explaining that there are a large number of Revenue Protection Inspectors and the
BTP▸ at the end of the line today. Lad says, "I'm getting off at the next station, nothing you can do." Next station is unstaffed.
Lad does indeed get off at the next station. Straight into the arms of the revenue team who had obviously moved up the line. The look on this lad's face was a picture as he realised all the station exits were covered. He tried to re-board but the conductor was having none of it. Shouting to the team, "Here's one for you. No ticket, no money. Refused to give me his details."
I spoke with the Conductor after this. Tells me he's encountered the lad before with no ticket or means to pay. He said that he was tempted to shout "Gotcha!" before dispatching. He satisfied himself with a smirk and the thumbs up to the revenue team.
